What I Help With
Divorce and Separation Counseling
Support for deciding, for separating with as much care as possible, and for rebuilding your life afterward.
Familiar Patterns
What It Can Feel Like
You do not have to arrive certain about what to do. I listen to your doubts, the losses you are facing and the care you want to bring to a difficult decision.
- Unsure whether to stay or go
- Grief for the marriage you hoped for
- Worry about children, young or adult
- Anger and blame
- Loneliness
- Questions about who you are now
We can make room for the relationship you hoped for, and the choices before you.
The past may hold love as well as disappointment. The future may feel hard to imagine, whether you stay together or separate. In the present, we can slow down the conversation and look candidly at what you need and what is possible.
What You Want
What Can Change
- A Clearer Conversation
- We look at what you want to say and what makes it difficult. Calming skills and communication practice can give hard conversations more room.
- Room for Loss
- Grief can concern the relationship you had or the one you hoped for. We work with what you feel without demanding that you settle it quickly.
- A Life of Your Own
- We consider your values, relationships and hopes as circumstances change. Your next steps remain yours to choose, with room to reflect and revise them.
Deciding Together or Alone
Sometimes couples work leads to a candid look at whether to continue the relationship. My role is to help you speak and listen honestly, not to steer you toward staying or leaving.
Individual sessions can help after a separation, or while you are considering one. We can work with loneliness, changing roles and questions about who you are now. If you have children, young or adult, we can think about how to speak with care while keeping them out of the conflict.
Couples Therapy
Ways We Explore It
How I Approach It
Communication Skills
We work on expressing needs and concerns without letting every discussion become an argument. Clearer communication can matter while deciding, during separation and in conversations afterward.
Grief and Loss Work
We make room for the marriage you hoped for and the losses you feel now. Anger, relief and sadness can belong to the same experience without canceling one another out.
Insight Into Relationship Patterns
We consider how past experiences shaped the relationship and your response to its changes. Understanding a pattern can help you see choices more clearly, without assigning all the blame to yourself.
Skills for Calming Yourself
Strong feelings can make practical conversations harder. I help you practice ways to settle yourself and return to what you want to say, while respecting how difficult the situation is.
Who I See for This
I work with adults from their twenties into their nineties. Individual sessions give us room to understand your experience in the context of your life, relationships and hopes.
Couples sessions may be useful when the concern is also affecting how partners relate. We discuss what you want help with and choose a format that gives the work room.
Frequently Asked Questions
Can you help us decide whether to divorce?
We can look candidly at your relationship, your concerns and what each of you wants. I help you think and communicate without deciding for you.
Do you work with people after a divorce is final?
Yes. Individual sessions can make room for grief, changing relationships and the life you want to build afterward.
Will you help with telling the children?
We can think through how to talk with your children, at any age, in a way that protects them.
Related Pages
Related Reading
Turning Fights Into Conversations
When a familiar argument starts again, I help partners slow the exchange and say what they need in a way the other person can hear.
Read the GuideMore to Explore
- Grieving a Relationship
Make room for the loss of a relationship, its routines and its imagined future without requiring yourself to feel only one way.
- Self-Worth After Separation
Explore the judgments a separation can bring about your worth and how to distinguish a relationship’s ending from your whole identity.